Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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