he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Less talking, more tequila
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize