So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
