Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize