Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Never joke about your clitoris.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
