Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I have demons in me.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
