Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
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Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
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These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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