these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
