So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
