Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
