This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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