you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
It was like getting head from an anaconda
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
