My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize