Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize