I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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