Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (416): View more from Ontario

  i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones

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  (416): i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones http://tfl.nu/stex
  Replies (54) Good night (3810) Bad night (1620)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Finally jerked of with a banana peel.

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  (818): Finally jerked of with a banana peel. http://tfl.nu/gj9m
  Replies (27) Good night (1508) Bad night (4590)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover

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  (805): i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover http://tfl.nu/9f4v
  Replies (12) Good night (4629) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.

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  (601): He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal. http://tfl.nu/idbe
  Replies (12) Good night (801) Bad night (3635)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"

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  (319): By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection" http://tfl.nu/gcjm
  Replies (14) Good night (5361) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh

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  (651): i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh http://tfl.nu/x346
  Replies (29) Good night (10419) Bad night (1155)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.

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  (413): woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol. http://tfl.nu/kdb1
  Replies (21) Good night (1206) Bad night (8766)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  you will always have a special place in my vag

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  (828): you will always have a special place in my vag http://tfl.nu/evl8
  Replies (23) Good night (5852) Bad night (1236)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics

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  (513): i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics http://tfl.nu/sgxc
  Replies (9) Good night (4262) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.

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  (703): just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking. http://tfl.nu/uhxv
  Replies (15) Good night (1697) Bad night (5271)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.

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  (313): We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/ypzc
  Replies (5) Good night (4382) Bad night (904)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".

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  (815): Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime". http://tfl.nu/6eu2
  Replies (3) Good night (2387) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical 

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  (518): We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical  http://tfl.nu/e1go
  Replies (8) Good night (1547) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We left the knife in your bed.

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  (780): We left the knife in your bed. http://tfl.nu/mwcc
  Replies (9) Good night (576) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.

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  (303): I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen. http://tfl.nu/ym4o
  Replies (2) Good night (854) Bad night (349)

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