Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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