i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Sorry my hands just texted you
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
i now understand why vodka
Randomize
