Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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