I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
