pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
