I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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