No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize