would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
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