I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
