i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
