doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
