Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
