it's like iHOP with fire
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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