I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
