I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize