he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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