I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize