I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
