so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Randomize
