I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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