Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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