another moral hangover. fuck.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize
