Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
