Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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