Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
