90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just invented taco cereal.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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