The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
