at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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