Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
