Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize
