Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

farters have to be the big spoon...

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(913): farters have to be the big spoon... http://tfl.nu/5j3w

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy

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(608): the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy <3's balls" is written in sharpie across my forehead http://tfl.nu/cffy

Replies (24) Good night (1476) Bad night (4499)
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(425): View more from Washington

I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.

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(425): I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie. http://tfl.nu/58ia

Replies (12) Good night (5135) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.

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(405): I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost. http://tfl.nu/voez

Replies (41) Good night (7512) Bad night (2095) Order T-Shirt
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(905): View more from Ontario

The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.

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(905): The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty. http://tfl.nu/9wi8

Replies (100) Good night (12150) Bad night (1767) Order T-Shirt
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(870): View more from Arkansas

Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.

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(870): Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/xv3v

Replies (30) Good night (3786) Bad night (1236) Order T-Shirt
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(501): View more from Arkansas

SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.

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(501): SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD. http://tfl.nu/21ls

Replies (30) Good night (11681) Bad night (1156) Order T-Shirt
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.

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(401): Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since. http://tfl.nu/058n

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(519): View more from Ontario

You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.

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(519): You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone. http://tfl.nu/p7fo

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(250): View more from British Columbia

I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying

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(250): I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying http://tfl.nu/ewgt

Replies (10) Good night (2143) Bad night (522)
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(406): View more from Montana

The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.

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(406): The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home. http://tfl.nu/zgt5

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.

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(832): i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night. http://tfl.nu/81zt

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(785): View more from Kansas

The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.

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(785): The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked. http://tfl.nu/4i2t

Replies (6) Good night (1630) Bad night (401)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.

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(613): Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in. http://tfl.nu/gv1u

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING

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(201): Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING http://tfl.nu/cx17

Replies (3) Good night (453) Bad night (204) Order T-Shirt

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