I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Sorry about my life...
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
