Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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