I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
