god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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