You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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