I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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